Choosing A Provider: Comparing Funeral Homes and Cemeteries

Because the services of funeral homes and cemeteries are only occassionally utilized, most individuals do not have a good understanding of how to pick the "right" one. As a result, the choice ends up being made on the basis of the easiest criterion: price.

In other respects, we see all providers as inherently similar. It is important to remember that the costs of funeral services, burial or cremation, especially in a competitive market, can occupy a range that is too narrow to make meaningful distinctions possible. Plus, we must keep in mind that just like wedding services, this is a service industry; you need to feel comfortable with the person, not just the product.

Successful comparison does not mean getting the cheapest price, it means getting the best value!

That does not mean that price comparison can be dismissed entirely. For one thing, price structures can be confusing, and consumers may not always be comparing apples to apples (Watch our video on comparing pricing). Most funeral homes offer different “packaged” prices for a combination of goods and services, and different providers bundle different items together. It makes obvious sense to know exactly what is included so that different packages can be compared.

In addition to packaged services, providers offer individual prices for specific items, and you should be able to choose among their offerings and select the specific items that you wish to purchase. In fact, every funeral home is legally required to disclose its prices, both in packaged and in “a la carte” arrangements.

Products should receive similar treatment. Does the funeral home offer the products you need? If not, will they help you with those products? If you locate those products elsewhere, is the funeral home open to that possibility? You have the legal right to provide your own products. It is hardly ideal, especially when making difficult decisions, to be forced into asserting a legal right in order to get what you want.

Does the funeral home offer the services you want? Are there people on staff to do cosmetics and restoration if that is your choice? Are there alternatives to embalming if that is your preference?

If you plan to conduct a funeral service, be sure that the funeral home has a chapel large enough to accommodate everyone who is expected to attend, and confirm that it has adequate provision for people who may need handicapped access or other assistance. If people are coming from out of town, will the funeral home assist with that?

Is the funeral home well maintained and clean? Does it offer the ambience that seems appropriate to you? Can they provide you with references from other customers? Can they link you to online testimonials?

Do you feel well treated by staff? Do you have plenty of time to make decisions, or do you feel at all rushed or pressured?

Do you feel that your cultural and religious preferences are understood? Has the funeral home had experience with those preferences?

Quick List for Funeral Homes:

  1. How long has it been in business?
  2. How comfortable does the Funeral Director or Preneed Counselor make you feel? How about the Staff?
  3. Are they able to accommodate all of your guests?
  4. Are they able to service all of your requests? (Dove release, wine party, a specific song, etc?)
  5. Can they give you testimonial and/or direct you to online reviews?
  6. How does their pricing compare to the market place?
  7. Is the funeral home a pleasant place to be?

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Cemeteries should also be compared, whether you are interested in burial or in the care of cremated remains. Some choices are straightforward, like the location of the cemetery itself. That location should suit your immediate needs, but you may also want to consider its convenience for family and friends who may want to visit in the future.

Location is not the only criterion. Is a plot available? Is the plot in a particular location within the cemetery? Are other adjacent plots available? Does the cemetery have the appropriate religious affiliation?

How do the grounds look? Are they maintained or does it appear that everything is overgrown? One word of caution though. Keep in mind the time of the year that you are on the grounds, in the spring when everything grows very quickly keeping up with the grass can be a difficult task. However, if there are still weeds and uncut areas late summer then this should be a concern.

Cemetery costs often include fees in addition to the cost of the plot or other space. Opening and closing the grave, installing a headstone and caring for the plot after burial may all be extra charges.

Ask about the cemetery’s rules and regulations. Those rules may determine whether you can use the style and size of headstone or marker you prefer.

Quick List for Cemeteries:

  1. How long has it been in business?
  2. How comfortable does the Preneed Counselor make you feel? How about the Staff?
  3. How well-kept are the grounds?
  4. Is this a place that you would want to visit? Is it convenient?
  5. Is the cemetery religious affiliated or do they have an affiliated section?
  6. If you’re a veteran, do they offer special sections for you and spouse?
  7. How are the mausoleums?
  8. If you are being cremated do they have niches or offer ground burial?

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Decisions about funerals and cemeteries are often made in the midst of severe emotional turmoil, but even people who have planned long in advance can find it hard to make these kinds of choices. It helps to have a sense of the practical considerations at issue, but some things are not so easy to explain.

In the end, there is no substitute for the unquantifiable feeling that you are in competent and respectful hands.

Remember…Price is only part of the value equation!